I’ll take one boring relationship please. What does that even mean? Well, one thing I can tell you, is I don’t want to be bored in a relationship. That’s completely different from what I mean. Let me explain.
Everyone knows that exciting relationships are fun, and it’s great to go out on dates all the time that are fun and thrilling. I’ve gone on a few that are fun, but not every relationship can have you eat dinner at a country club, and party at a marina. Or go on a helicopter ride for the afternoon. That’s an exciting activity, and can make any date seem fun. What I’m looking for though, is something that will last. Since I’m not a celebrity, odds of me having those kind of dates every single day are very unlikely. So instead, since I live in the real world, where there are bills to pay and I don’t have a million dollars, I want a boring relationship.
I want a relationship where we can spend time together doing the most mundane boring things, like grocery shopping, and we make it fun. Or I’m sitting on my side of the couch, and he’s on his, and we are both reading or working on our computers, separately but still together. While I’d like to think that we will always have these extremely exciting moments in our lives, to me it’s more important that we have these quiet moments together. That’s what makes a relationship. That’s what keeps a relationship strong. If you can’t enjoy these quiet moments together, and the every day realities of life, then I hate to break it to you, but you aren’t meant to be. A relationship shouldn’t be about always entertaining each other, you should be able to work separately, in the same room and be content with that.
For so many, the idea of a relationship is doing these exciting dates together, while getting to know a person. Maybe they go hot air ballooning or go to a theme park. Don’t get me wrong, doing stuff like that is fun, and I think it should definitely be penciled in. But at the same time, just sitting together having a cup of coffee while you watch the sunrise can be fun and exciting, if you’re with the right person.
Now, all of that may not be the most exciting. Music and movies certainly tell us that we should be with the person that makes our hearts pound, and gives us that thrill and rush. In those movies, there’s also usually a car chase, or some explosion of some sort. Or you know, aliens attacking. With things like that romanticized, it’s easy to think that you need excitement in your relationship. But when you think about what you do every single day of your life. Your day to day experiences, they usually aren’t all that thrilling. You get up, go to work, and come home. Now maybe you do some pretty amazing things after work and on the weekends, but you can’t go mountain climbing every day. For those quiet days, and afternoons, think about what you want. Do you want a man who is climbing up your window just for the thrill of it? I don’t. I want the man that is by my side, while we watch a Netflix marathon of our favorite shows. Sure, it’s not the most exciting life. But it’s more likely what I’m going to do on a Friday night. I mean, it’s that or skydiving, and jumping out of perfectly good planes, not really my thing. It may not be good for you, but for me, a boring relationship sounds great.
One thing I’ve noticed, between my dating history and others, the relationships that tend to last the longest, are the boring ones. The ones where each party is happy doing their own thing at times, and enjoys spending time together, even if they’re just spending time at the house. Sometimes, that’s all you need in a relationship. If you’re in it just for the exciting dates, you should probably rethink your commitment to this person; odds are, you like the dates, but if you two had some quiet time together, would you be able to handle it? Would you be able to just go sit out under the stars, and have comfortable silence? Or would you get bored, because it’s not the person, it’s the activity? Think about it. I don’t want to get bored with my significant other because we aren’t doing something exciting for the day. I want every day with him to be an adventure, even if the most adventurous thing we do is go the Target for new towels.